i can do this only once.

then i would have to do some thing else. and then i would need to do more things, to figure out how to do something like this.  and this is how i am writing. and this is how i wanted these words in this exact order. these posts, are how i wanted them. so that is how i think at the moment. i like to think that i am talking to the great internet consciousness. but that gets into some deep shit sometimes.